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Is Shame Choking the Life Out of Your Soul?

Sometimes it felt like too much for Jesus to really see me. When He peered into the depths of my being, shame overwhelmed me.

Pride, selfishness, envy—all tucked away in the greyscale, jagged nooks and crannies of my soul—I preferred to stay distracted, numb, invisible.


But I’ve learned through counseling, if this is my response to Jesus’ sweet presence—His confidential, cherished company—I’m either stuck in sin or believing lies.

Have you ever been listening to a podcast or message, or talking with a friend, and felt as if Jesus was speaking so intimately and directly to you that you were stripped bare?

When Jesus comes close, the soul is awakened and unveiled.

What do you believe Jesus saw as He scanned the horizon of your soul in that moment?

  • sin
  • shame
  • doubt
  • emptiness

This was me, to the point of being riddled with remorse and crippled with shame. It’s taken years of unknowing, but most days, I now believe He sees something altogether different.

  • beloved
  • blameless
  • blessed
  • daughter

Meeting Jesus in the pages of Scripture, we discover a gentle teacher, healer, and shepherd: a man of His word, because He is the Word wrapped in flesh.

One person encountered Jesus in such a way, leaving him feeling seen and loved the way Jesus meant for each of us to be.

Upon meeting Nathanael, a stranger but soon-to-be follower, Jesus announced his character to all in earshot. 

Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward Him and said, ‘Now here is a genuine son of Israel—a man of complete integrity.” Nathanael replied, ‘How do you know me?’ Jesus answered him, ‘Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.’”John 1:47-48

We know Nathanael couldn’t have been sinless, yet Jesus told Nathanael He saw him and found a man of complete integrity.

When we meet someone, we size them up, making a few prejudgments based on their appearance and interaction, but we can’t discern their full character.

But this is Jesus’ way. He peers into the depths of one’s soul, perceiving their past, examining their present, and regarding their future. He’s immediately acquainted with the entirety of the soul and all it holds.

How many times does Scripture say Jesus looked at someone or a group of people and “was moved with compassion?”

Jesus is the Master of mindreading, Sensei of soul perception, Jedi of justice.

In my smallness of mind, as God veiled in flesh, this seems too much for His humanity to handle. Envision Him seeing past the present and private pain of a hurting soul and into a desolate and fractured future unless He acted on their behalf.

Think of how you respond to tragedy or suffering, and conceptualize the God who knows all attempting to squelch the cascade of physical and emotional reactions in response to the brokenness of humanity all around Him.

The containment of God of the Universe in the confines of flesh must’ve been overwhelming at times. Yet He would not miss one opportunity to look deep into one more set of troubled, tearful eyes and bring comfort, healing, and hope.

A Man with a mission, He would not be deterred one pace heavenward until it was time, because He had places to go, souls to see, and people to love.

Friend, what are you afraid for Jesus to see in you? A secret sin, a soured mindset, a wound buried so deep you no longer acknowledge the pain? He not only sees it but wants to soothe, comfort, and heal, bringing light and hope. 

When Nathanael encountered Jesus, he met the One his heart longed for. When we allow Jesus in, He saves us, in every way.

Then Nathanael exclaimed, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God!” John 1:48

Allow Him to see you, as He saw Nathanael under the fig tree that day, searching the caverns of your soul, apprehending the anxiety and worry crowding your mind.

He’ll not merely see, but call. Call out sin and shame from the darkness into His glorious light–cleansing, restoring and renewing. But He also calls out truth—your legitimate identity in Him—adopted, redeemed, loved, free.

Allow His magnificent light into the knarled crevasses and festering wounds, then listen to the redeeming truths He whispers in love. Let them spill over your soul and into the brokenness of the world. Not only will you find healing, but others will find joy in the overflow.

He is the God who sees, heals, calls and enables.

Faithful is He who called you, for He will bring it to pass. 1 Thes.5:24

Weekly Health Tip- color me orange!

Orange fruits and veggies are designed to meet specific nutritional needs. Here are some of the benefits of this not-just-for-fall color:

  • Cancer prevention
  • Immunity
  • Anti-bacterial
  • Skin health
  • Reproductive health

Sources: apricot, bell peppers, cantaloupe, carrot, mango, nectarine, orange, pumpkin, winter squash, sweet potato, turmeric

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Lisa Underwood

    I love the story about Nathaniel under a fig tree, noticed by Jesus. How simple and revealing were his words. Thanks KC good post

    1. KC Edmunds

      Lisa, thank you for your encouragement and sharing how Jesus speaks to you.

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